Sunday, September 22, 2013

Kick-Ass 2 Kicks Ass

Gorier,sexier and even more bad ass sums up Kick-Ass 2. I know the movie was released a long time ago but had to wait for a good quality print to pirate. Joking, I saw it in theater. Or did I???
The same cast from Kick Ass returns with a few welcome additions(The Mask). These new members along with the oldies make for an epic showdown between the good Justice Forever(not a rip-off of JLA ) and the evil TOXIC MEGA CUNTS (their cunts got exposed to heavy radiation in Chernobyl and now they have awesome vagina blasters). Forgot to mention that the TMCs are led by The MOTHERFUCKER. Beat that.
Chloe Mortez is sexier than ever. She is the best thing that's happened to the world after the fateful night when Scar JOs dad boned her momma.
Kick Ass 2 is action packed and fast paced and I am finding it pretty difficult to make fun of it. A few sex scenes would have been appreciated but that would be like Christmas in July(#courtesy You don't mess with the Zohan).
Verdict if you liked #Kick Ass then you are definitely going to like #Kick Ass 2.

Friday, September 20, 2013

This weeks Movie We are the Millers

Movies can teach us valuable lessons. These are a few lessons I learnt from We are the Millers starring Jason Sudekis, Ed Helms(Stu from Hangover), Emma Roberts(Nancy Drew) and Jennifer Aniston(If you don't know her then you are in the matrix).

Lesson 1: Don't rush into sucking dicks, 1000 pesos are worth only eighty dollars.
Lesson 2: When a spider bites you on your nuts,you don't turn into Spiderman. You don't  turn into anything .Just a guy with huge red scratchy balls.
Lesson 3: Abandoned garages are not out of work, they are used by MILFs for stripping. Hell they even have poles, chains and sparks.
Lastly the best name for stripper is Boner Garage. No seriously it is good.

All in all its a pretty nice movie.I give it 3 hot Anistons.